Category Archives: siblings

My Big Little Brother


My Big Little Brother

Since the event in May 2013 we have had no contact with McDad. Who really wants to have that kind of negative influence in one life? My daughter certainly has made it clear that she won’t have anything to do with violence, verbal or otherwise.

We talk freely about McDad. She tells me of times she spent with him (mostly fast food and shopping trips with the very occasional day at the science museum etc). It’s both a blessing and a tragedy that she has fewer stories of times out and about with him than she does about times spent with my brothers.

My little brother is home on from the ship and she is enjoying spending lots of time with him. He tries to be home for her when she gets back from school and pretty much taken over the cooking of the evening meals. He’s busy doing ‘man’ jobs around the house like fixing broken cupboard door and tidying the garden.

It’s lovely to hear Inny telling him all about her school day and him offering his manly perspective before offering a bear hug. He has expressed his expectation that she focuses when doing homework and was super encouraging when he found out she was taking extra math classes on Saturday mornings, checking what she is covering and her progress.

Together they are a great team. They are the team that she and McDad should be.

So in the absence of a decent father we are blessed to have him in our home.

As for me it’s lovely to have another adult to spend time with and talk about life and current affairs. He’s been so supportive on my C25K journey so far, offering to stay in with Inny while I go do my thing, giving me a fitness monitor and has even joined my gym!

Last night we sat chatting for an hour of so about charity and a news piece we had just seen. It was a simple evening and a lovely one.

Once again we will have serious Uncle/MrR withdrawal when he leaves.

I am very lucky to have three wonderful brothers in my life. MrB is calm and collected and an excellent listener, nothing is too much trouble for him when it comes to family. MrM is the life and soul and always the centre of attention (just don’t let him start telling jokes) but when the shit hits the fan he’s a man who want to help fix it. Lastly my big little brother, MrR, a whole 6 foot 3 but he brings calmness to the room, brings peace with him and is so generous with his time.

It’s not always plain sailing between us (especially with MrM, there is only 12 months between us and when we argue bystanders slowly back out of the room) but gosh I love these guys so much!


Email from my brother today

Once again my sister…..


Max Ehrmann

Go placidly amid the noise and haste,
and remember what peace there may be in silence.
As far as possible without surrender
be on good terms with all persons.
Speak your truth quietly and clearly;
and listen to others,
even the dull and the ignorant;
they too have their story.
Avoid loud and aggressive persons,
they are vexations to the spirit.
If you compare yourself with others,
you may become vain and bitter;
for always there will be greater and lesser persons than yourself.
Enjoy your achievements as well as your plans.
Keep interested in your own career, however humble;
it is a real possession in the changing fortunes of time.
Exercise caution in your business affairs;
for the world is full of trickery.
But let this not blind you to what virtue there is;
many persons strive for high ideals;
and everywhere life is full of heroism.
Be yourself.
Especially, do not feign affection.
Neither be cynical about love;
for in the face of all aridity and disenchantment
it is as perennial as the grass.
Take kindly the counsel of the years,
gracefully surrendering the things of youth.
Nurture strength of spirit to shield you in sudden misfortune.
But do not distress yourself with dark imaginings.
Many fears are born of fatigue and loneliness.
Beyond a wholesome discipline,
be gentle with yourself.
You are a child of the universe,
no less than the trees and the stars;
you have a right to be here.
And whether or not it is clear to you,
no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should.
Therefore be at peace with God,
whatever you conceive Him to be,
and whatever your labors and aspirations,
in the noisy confusion of life keep peace with your soul.
With all its sham, drudgery, and broken dreams,
it is still a beautiful world.
Be cheerful.
Strive to be happy.