Monthly Archives: December 2014

Distance silence

So how do you have a long distance relationship with someone who is not good at tech communication?

In this day and age there are a multitude of ways to communicate. Between us we have BBM, Whatsapp, email, phone and text yet communicating with MrMA feels a bit like pulling teeth.

I write a paragraph he responds with….. Yep.

Which is not what he’s like in person at all. In fact is positively boisterous in the flesh. He’s a lover of cheesy jokes and a sturdy soap box!

It’s pretty frustrating!

But he has explained that he’s not a writer of any description and so doesn’t really text or email etc.

I consciously ask open ended questions.

And wait for his return.

Merry Bloody Christmas

Again I’ve come home virtually empty handed!

I bought a pair of gloves and some mince pies. I have weakness for mince pies and so got side tracked and forgot to post the Christmas cards!

So not only did I fail to buy Christmas presents; I also missed the posting deadline.

No one is getting cards from me before Christmas this year.

When did Christmas get so traumatic!

I’m usually so organised and my Christmas list is impressive. By the end of November I’m usually finished with the buying and have started the wrapping!

Yet here I am 5 days away and I’m not even half way through.

It’s so stressful!

But this year the situation at work has been so distracting and for the past few months I was focused on my trip to Nigeria.

Christmas was so far from my mind.

Can I pull it together in time?

10 more on me………………

hamish

1. Though I can’t live without my mobile I hate answering the phone! Ever since I received a call telling me my father had died I feel like a ringing phone is bad news.

2. I’m partially deaf in one ear. Yep; I just smile and nod.

3. I dance in my kitchen most days; whether or not anyone else is in the house. This week it’s all about Paloma Faith’s ‘Only Love Can Hurt Like This’

4. I never wear gold jewellery.

5. I once hacked my waist length hair off with a steak knife while on holiday in Turkey. It was too hot so I left with an ear length bob.

6. I like my custard cold. Okay if it has to be warmed………aim for tepid.

7. When I read bedtime stories I make a different voice for every character. Apparently the all-time best voice is that of Hamish the highland cow.

8. I haven’t bought any Christmas presents yet! And its 9 days to Christmas! I’m in a panic! A total freak out!

9. I’m missing MrMA! How is that even possible?

10. Fake nails done by Koreans but no hair weave like Europeans!

A Chance Loop

If you change your mind
I’m the first in line
Honey I’m still free
Take a chance on me

Abba is a big thing in my family! A car journey with the kids inevitably involves the full Abba Gold album sang by all at full volume with the inevitable lyric corrections from my sassy five year old niece.
Abba has been playing a lot in my head of recent days.

If you change your mind
I’m the first in line
Honey I’m still free
Take a chance on me

These lyrics are on a permanent loop and they annoy the hell out of me because in my head I’m singing them to MrMA.
And quite frankly I don’t want to ever be the woman hanging around waiting for a guy to change his mind and choose me.

Like some back up plan.

Some reserve side chic.

My life is good and happy.

You have to enhance that.

You have to want me.

Oh you can take your time baby, I’m in no hurry, know I’m gonna get you
You don’t wanna hurt me, baby don’t worry, I ain’t gonna let you

10 on me……………

  1. I like a cup of hot water with my meals.
  2. I have a strong aversion to unpainted toe nails, especially my own.
  3. I’ve died my hair red for almost 20 years; so long that i have to check old photos to remind myself what colour my hair actually is!
  4. I have a high pain threshold, 28 hours labour, no pain killers, was walking round a shopping mall for 3 of them.
  5. I suffer from insomnia (and sheep are not boring enough)
  6. I read a lot and fast! Game of thrones books 1-2 = 10 days tops.
  7. I gave up smoking on March 3rd 2009. Not touched a single cigarette since then!
  8. I won’t eat anything that I wouldn’t kill (so can’t eat rabbit; KILL A BUNNY? NEVER!)
  9. I wont eat while walking…………….. no matter how hungry I am.
  10. Food is either sweet or sour. The two don’t belong on the same plate. There’s a rule about it somewhere; i know there is!

Return Of The MA(C)

So you say I write too many long emails.

And I have promised not to write any more to you.

I don’t think we mentioned anything about blogging…….. did we? No I’m sure we didn’t as you don’t even know that I write a blog. I’m quite sure you don’t.

So no emails but loads of blog posts.

And I’ll forget about the Tort conversation.

So we are now in our 20th year of this ‘relationship’. After being together for 2 years at Uni we have been dropping in and out of each other’s lives ever since. You proposed; I refused. I wanted; you didn’t. You proposed again; I refused. I had a kid; you got married. I became single; you had kids.

Our timing has always been out but life has always pulled us back together. We’ve both been at different stages of our lives and unable to be with each other or commit.

We’ve had moments sat arguing on the couch, warred by text, dined in splendour, kissed with passion, we ran away for long weekends and ignored each other for years.

We’ve been frustrated and angry with each other.

But it’s always comes back round to you and I.
So here we are again.

Only this time we are unattached and free. Free to go where we want, do what we want.
Free to be ………………………. With each other.

Why is that so scary?

We say we will see how that goes. That this is our opportunity to finally build the relationship that we’ve always wanted.

We say we will see how it goes. We say it casually.

Why is that so scary?

I waiver from wanting it to go fast and be a full blown relationship; to wanting to run and hide. It’s a bit overwhelming.

Was part of the attraction the constant chase and longing? Is the memory of us in our early twenties better than the reality of now?

Should we even try?

As you left this morning you advised me; ‘don’t think too much about it’

Which was like asking a fish not to swim.